Fifth of May (Jonathan Coulton song parody)

I don’t always write song parodies, but when I do they’re to the tune of Jonathan Coulton …

Fifth of May (ttto “First of May” by Jonathan Coulton)

I woke up this morning
I had some coffee from Juan Valdez
And then I had a little conversation with my Latino friends
I said I’m in the mood to party
In the middle of the spring
Then The Most Interesting Man in the World
Began to sing
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LifeLock Meets The Ultimate Challenge

I took a break from the Olympics, booking last-minute plane tickets and uploading photos to watch some Top Gear clips at their website. The banner ad placement at the top of the page was perfect …

LifeLock Meets The Stig
LifeLock Meets The Stig

Yes my friends, a LifeLock banner next to The Stig. That is an identity theft protection ad appearing over the head of one of the most famous anonymous people in the world of television. This is a banner ad win.

Five TV Personalities You Never Want To Meet

There are a lot of TV personalities that seem warm, fuzzy and approachable. You totally want to be on their show. Heck, these are the type of people that you might want to invite over for dinner. Alton Brown in my kitchen … awesome idea. Bryan Williams asking me to pass the gravy … fantastic. Conan O’Brien looking for extra hair gel in your guest bathroom … odd, but entirely acceptable.

However, many media personalities are people you never want to meet … especially on their TV turf. These are the type of people who only appear on your doorstep if you’re accused of a crime, standing in a war zone or about to be swept into the ocean. If you end up on their show you are screwed.

Totally. Royally. Screwed.

Based on a conversation with my friends, here are my top five TV personalities you never want to meet.

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The Three Photo Sequence

I’ve put some of my video habit aside to work on photography, thanks to my new Canon Rebel T1i. On my last photo outing to the Little Five Points Halloween Parade, I captured a classic three photo sequence. This requires a little bit of explanation so you understand the source of the funny.

Note: one of the photos is in slightly poor taste. It’s not what I would call “not safe for work” but it’s borderline. Also, my Mom might not like it very much … just warning you in advance …

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